he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
Im just saying it can't be that bad if he drove himself to the er. We'll head that way when we finish playing scattergories
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
His dad gives me dirty looks whenever I come over though. I think it's because I eat his food and have sex with his son.
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
We were supposed fuck one time, but ended up fucking for 2 years.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
