He said he used to draw on the walls with poop when he was a kid.
I'm sorry. Both for you two breaking up and because I just ate some of your cheez it's.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Are we still banned from the library?
i need to stop celebrating other people's birthdays like they are m own.. my body can't handle a birthday every week
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Oh and apparently something happened that was related to "THIS IS SPARTA" but no one will tell me what I did.
So I'm going to blame my boobs hurting on that.
He said I was really mad at him on Friday. Dude I fell asleep in all my clothes and shoes, with my flashlight on, on my phone... I could have been mad at the wall. It wasn't my classiest day.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
Doesn't matter if you work at a funeral home. If the boss says get a keg, you get a keg.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Thx for last night. I've never had so much fun while being told my life decisions are questionable at best.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Randomize
