are you still at the devil's house?
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Last time I saw him the sun was coming up and he was asleep in the student wellness parking lot. For some reason people were peeing on him.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
Any time you can't remember a night, and you wake up in a sorority house, it's fucking worth it.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
His dick is the size of my forearm. Would it be rude to ask to take a comparison photo after sex?
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
Be quiet or buzz aldrin will come beat you up with science
I'm pretty sure I smell like alcoholism and shame. And it's not a pretty scent.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
