Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I'm not being over dramatic, but I think my heart is going to stop beating.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
Overall win. We all know who got to sleep on the concrete outside of Denny's with you.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
I'm sorry I missed your birthday brunch. If it makes you feel any better I woke up wearing someone else's toga and a sombrero
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