i will never coherently bang her
i wish i could google "things to eat in my fridge" so i wouldnt have to go downstairs and be disappointed
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
He changed his profile picture to him as a baby. Definitely a turn off. This will help in my "don't-be-a-slut-endeavors"
I renamed his cat Jeff last night. Well I spray painted it on him.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
There was pot, but there are no Doritos, no Funyons, no Oreos.
Send help.
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
