Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to start this convo out by apologizing for the broken toaster.
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
THIS IS EXACTLY WHY YOU SHOULDA FUCKED BEFORE YOU MADE HIM YOUR BOYFRIEND, CURVED DICKS ARE NOT OK
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Another guy on Tinder just asked about "the hotter girl" in my pictures. I fucking hate being your friend.
I just need to find someone whose kink is financial submission.
Ugh I realized he only responds to my snaps when I’m eating a popsicle
Why are male brains so small?
We are totally like Jim and Pam, except ya know, drunk and not together anymore.
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize