we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I feel like dying is the new "adopt an african baby"
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
Apparently, I woke him up at 4AM, and yelled "you're mad because we don't have sex," while grabbing his dick. Then immediately fell back asleep, dick in hand.
I'm already mentally preparing myself for the fact that I'll probably be sleeping next to a toilet.
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I'm glad we are bonding over both contracting clamidya. Winners.
100%
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
I'm giving head in a stairwell, I'll be back in a few minutes. I'm so ashamed.
COCAINE IS GR8
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
It was an entirely appropriate time and place for sexual thoughts.
That doesn't make it ok to play by play me your honeymoon!
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