Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
WTF?! TAYLOR SWIFT JUST WON ARTIST OF THE YEAR OVER MICHAEL JACKSON?! WHAT IS THIS WORLD COMING TO?!
I saw a girl walking around campus with bandages on both her knees. I need to get her number.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay, guy from work I want to fuck just told me he liked the font on my PowerPoint presentation. It is so on.
Make me proud, climb that corporate ladder.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
Ohhhh sweet! I may be down for that. I'll be a german beer girl probably passed out on a park bench somewhere.
Please do not make a facebook page for my hickeys.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I blacked out after I decided drinking alone on the trailered jetskis was a good idea
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I just want you to know when I bang him in the back of my car later I'll have pony by ginuwine on repeat
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
HEY I WILL KIDNAP THE FUCK OUT OF YOUR PET GOAT
Randomize