okay pat passed out under dana's car
hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
Drunk on an escalator. I fell like 15 flights of stairs without actually moving more than 5 feet.
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
You were rubbing sand all over yourself and everyone else and claiming you were "EXFOLIATING."
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Don't blame me. My vagina leads me astray.
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I just realized. I havent even gotten a paycheck from this new job yet and already laid one of the girls most of the dudes are after
I came home and drank a bottle of wine in the bathtub. I have AMAZING coping skills!!
Randomize
