I'm playing with the baby I just found in your kitchen
sometimes i wish i could find another girl that loves my dick as much as she does
i feel like she has dreams of it being like a person saying hey lets go play
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
How drunk is "too drunk" for candlelight service?
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
apparently i came home last night raving about goats and singing songs from muppet treasure island
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Some mornings I close deals. Other mornings I puke out my window while I’m driving down the highway
I'm too picky for internet dating and by picky I mean psycho.
Randomize