hey call me
can't. in the shower.
... and this is probably why your phone does not work half the time.
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Dude, the girl next to me just farted. Worst part, it smells like astroglide
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
I don't even have to sign up for karaoke at duncans anymore. The karaoke ppl just sign me up themselves. Without my consent. I also sang stacys mom to some lady named Stacy who's mom died yesterday.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
I hit a bug from across the room with my flip flop boomerang style. That awesome.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apple trackpads and semen don't mix. On the way to the Apple Store.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
The port-o-potty that I peed in last night didn't actually have a toilet in it. And i never told anyone until this moment.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
I know we're not on great terms here, but I need to know if you're still available for sexual activity...cause if not I need to get going on a work-out plan.
Randomize