birthday sex, birthday sex, birthday sex
I'm on my period, period, period
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Wednesday. Otherwise known, to you at least, as "there are two gay men in my bed" day.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
Don't they also have a lot of serious head injuries?
I didn't say I wanted to marry one of them. Or that I want one to perform surgery on me. I just want to have hot, dirty, MMA style sex.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The whole bar erupted and in happiness and confusion as I went on about pancakes.
Came home from this girls horse at 6am to find a guy lighting off roman candles in front of my door. Best walk of fame I've ever had.
I'm turning into an adult here.
Adults touch each other's special zones.
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
We got caught fucking on the couch while I was in my Godzilla onesie.
She was cleaning herself at the bus stop. She also picked up gum off the ground and ate it
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