i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
he went down on me with a nose plug on, you tell me how it went
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
This means I've slept with 2 ppl that live in vans...my life is complete
How do you forget making out with a coworker in the dressing room at Sears on more than one occasion?
...object impermanence?
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
Playing pong against a girl who fucked my ex boyfriend so that's how my nights going
Hey. It's Michael. The guy that had his tongue in your mouth last night. Just wanted to check in with you.
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
My New Years resolution is actually to be MORE petty
Randomize
