is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I swear to god if he wasnt on the fourth floor balcony and I wasn't to drunk to climb I would kill him
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Whiskey chased with ice cubes? Here's a big FUCK THAT to that
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
you weren't there so I had to flirt with him on your behalf
WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
We were making out and truffle butter was playing in the background. I stopped mid make out session and said, "I'm really sorry but I have to rap Nicki's part."
Uhhh...I just found your 10 dollar bill in my bra. I owe you 10 dollars.
Randomize
