I want to stick my p in your. b.
2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
I wish all the girls i wanted to sleep with knew how big my dick was then id have a better chance
College is just filling the gap until I get a rich girl pregnant
Dude. I have been looking at your movie history on netflix and it is like looking at the rings of a tree. Only instead of telling me how old you are, it tells me when you were stoned.
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
How did you tell her we met?
I told her that we met at the sex shop down the street, I thought it would be the most reasonable explanation.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Seriously though, I walked in and he was holding my cat in the air singing "the circle of life"...
Randomize
