We had like 4 guys come over and buy us all drinks as an excuse to hit on Kendra. Hanging out with her is now officially fiscally responsible.
i was actually impressed that she managed to throw up underwater while scuba diving
Escaped ambulance. Meet me at your apartment.
Got a thumbs up from a trucker for doing lines on the interstate. God bless america.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
yea i really dont care about the sex, i just want him to eat my vag. He has to be good at because of his tremors.
ya i guess you have to take things with a grain of salt in a place where nipple clamps are the norm..
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
fuck Derek. I choose weed. weed isn't angry and would never ask me to be someone I'm not.
I just almost puked & then I panicked and forced it back down because I thought I would be a waste of the apple turnover I ate.. I'm that hungover
Omg I can't even...
the fact that i came three times was completely negated by the fact that he high-fived himself after.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
Randomize
