I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
new call of duty comes out in november. guess im not passing my finals
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
If you're wearing dry underwear your day is already better than mine.
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
Just responding to the most professional request I've ever gotten to get shitfaced.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize