I'm really into asian looking animals
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
Climbing onto the roof in a dress and high heeled boots was probably not the best idea, especially after all that Bacardi.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
He wanted to put Kesha on after he came in my mouth. I had to draw some sort of trashy, gay line.
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
I walked out of the bedroom naked holding a used condom only to be greeted by half of my family. Happy birthday mom
So, this year for my birthday, want to get rip-roaring schmammered and watch my episode of my super sweet 16? We can do lines off my tiara.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
My entire news feed is ice bucket challenges. I wish there was a hide from feed button like FarmVille
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
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