Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
So what if i ate it off the ground. Its like i found a five dollar bill just laying there, in burrito form.
i no longer feel bad for not doin my schoolwork. im watching a porn in french. this MUST qualify as studying.
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
She said my dick tasted like a junior mint. Ive decided im using this soap the rest of my life
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
didn't prepare for this snow storm at all. i only have like 6 beer and all my booty calls already went home for the holiday. this is bull.
VAL. THIS MOTHERFUCKER IS LAYING IN MY BED WEARING A CAT SHIRT, VAL. COME SAVE ME, VAL.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
Pillow talk?
can't do it. no eye contact either.
Where have you been all my life
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
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