i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
how should i feel about a person who brings a box of eggo waffles on the plane as a carry on?
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
I think I died last night. I had 14 beers..well 13 1/2 if you count the one that got spilled on the baby in the elevator.
But seriously he was like a god with his hands. My vagina feels annointed.
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
After we had sex he began to tell me the craziest places he's had sex. He told me KFC bathroom so I rolled over and went to sleep.
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
It makes my nipple hurt just thinking about it.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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