let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
turns out I still hate jay leno...even at 10pm.
It's my fault there's ramen coiled around his penis.
cat food counts as protein by the way
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
I have your car and your sandals. My shoes are somewhere under the puke couch. Safari time.
If you haven't gone to the store yet. Can you PLEASE get me some clippers my balls will thank you later
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Overheard-"sex" and "giblet gravy" in the same sentence. Best thanksgiving ever.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
You would think by the size of the lump on my ass that I would have remembered falling down a flight of stairs.
He woke me up holding a gallon of apple juice and a shot glass...
My mom just used the chap stick I used right after giving him a blow job. I am a horrible daughter :(
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