I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
Changed my sheets. Found a can of rockstar, crushed bag of tostitos, used tissues, and enough of both of our clothes to make a whole outfit.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
In debating whether or not it's worth getting out of bed and walking 5 feet down the hallway to go to the bathroom before I puke
everybody makes mistakes
i didn't know they allowed you to text in ambulances
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
going to a night class in lingerie so i can quickly go to his house after.
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
I had nothing but condoms at the checkout, then grabbed a pack of Orbitz gum and said "gotta protect from bad breath" felt like a boss
dude. i woke up on a random lawn wearing only my boxers, with all my clothes hung in the branches of a nearby tree... no more shrooms
Randomize