I think taking a nice shit is a lot more satisfying than an orgasm. This is probably why I'm single.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You. Me. Frosting and a bed. Lets do this.
are you still mad that doritos made their way into my sex life
.....a litte
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
Xanax and an ambien. And wine. I'm just waiting for mouth to mouth from some hot EMT. Sort of like the slutty girls version of sleeping beauty
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
When your guy changes his swinger profile to include you. #makingprogress
What are you talking about? Keg stands at wedding are super classy.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
I forgot to bring soap and all I could find here was body wash. It's like bathing with laundry detergent.
Randomize