I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
just found the land before time on youtube... I'm so fucked for finals
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
We literally played a game called pass the child which consisted of us shitfaced tossing the 5 year old birthday boy at each other
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
walking back to the dorm.. she is flashing evryone, demanding beads. we tried to stop her and now she just keeps yelling "Bourbon st bitchesss"... you get her tomorrow
Stop leaving me alone with my ex boyfriends after keg challenges. Woke up in his bed covered in what you think would be cum. No...toothpaste. He left a note. "Be home at four. Don't be here when I get back."
I need a kidney, not a pussy. All the pussy in the world isn't going to save my life. Keep your pussy in your pants and give me a kidney.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
I can say with absolute certainty the only time we ever had a civil conversation was when we agreed we both liked pizza.
Well, I sent nudes with an Elmo t shirt on the floor... so there's that.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
Randomize
