is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
i just thanked the atm machine for giving me cash
You were telling me about how you were gonna marry him, have his children and name them all woodchip.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Woke up to the first three complete chapters of my new novel titled "If My Dick Could Talk" waiting for me on my laptop
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
The cab driver just showed us a POV shot of himself getting ridden by a chick he took with his flip phone. Confirmed not taken in cab. Gonna be a good night...
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
A place where it's acceptable to show body parts is not a good place for me to be.
Can I tell you that I just incorporated the spice girls in my sexting and you not judge me
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize
