I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
this stripper weighs a pound. I feel like I should tip her in food.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
yes he does come on. what guy wouldnt want his penis named after a dragon
I just remember going to take a piss and looking down on the floor and thinking "that looks comfortable" and then I was out.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
Ran into his sister at the gym and hit it in the parking lot. I dont even feel like a bad friend she got a boob job and lost 20 lbs its not even the same sister
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
I'm not breaking up with him because his husky is having puppies.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I'm just now realizing I've slept with guys from three different decades over the past year. That's gotta be some sort of record.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize
