Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Single schmingle. No one actually obeys the relationship boundaries these days. Its 2009.
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
I already banned bobbing for apples. While drunk that's just drowning near fruit.
Dude I'm about to just roll over and piss off the side of my bed, rather than make the conscious effort to get up and walk to the bathroom. One of those hangovers.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
YET AGAIN, my financial planning for 2013 consists MOSTLY of eating chipotle as "brain food" and drinking Heavily before the Jeopardy contestant test.
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
" my drug dealer just stopped by and did an elmo impression for my 2 year old nephew."
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
HIS DICK IS GLORIOUS AND I WANT TO RIDE IT TO VALHALLA
We will discuss everything tomorrow i presume. Including the sweaty naked tango.
I used to shoot steroids in my ass but for a totally different reason
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