"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
I'm timing the release of my poops to the sound of the machine gun from the video game he's playing in the living room.
I've broken several federal laws in the name of sex.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
Tonight marks the 1 yr anniversary of me waking up in a bush. is that reason enough to celebrate?
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
These fuzzy pants work great for sleeping, taking an exam, getting baked and watching the hobbit. I guess i'm not changing pants for 72 hours.
Only I could host a baby shower where the cops get called.
I woke up with a massive hangover and realized I still had an entire bottle of tequila in my car...so yeah, working on tomorrow's hangover.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I just found a reminder in my phone to ask you about your sex life in 7 years. So how is that going?
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.