i cleaned out my closet and found 7 beers from 2007. ive had 3 so far.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
Me focusing on not shitting my pants is keeping me awake.
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
Something tells me your "Titties for Tracy Morgan" fundraiser won't pan out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I'm drunk I really like to hold dicks. Like, affectionately.
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
We single women of America need to make America great again by refusing to fuck anyone who supports Trump.
"Fwd: Nice to meet you last night thanks for the tit flash" no recollec. i am officially banned from wearing tube tops to the bar.
excused from jury duty. THAT hungover...
On the brightside we know now that empty pringle cans are accepted at mcdonalds as cups.... Screw people who judged us, we saved a buck
Randomize