hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
We have a drunken confused pantless man in our apt. Boots.
Do you think the neighbors will know I was the one giving out the penis shaped lollipops to the children?
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I tried to lock you in the bathroom stall because you were too drunk. But you escaped from underneath, I gave up
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Maybe he injected his testicle?
It's okay I didn't send any nudes tonight so we are safe *inserts photo of a baseball umpire doing the safe signal*
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
uh why is my bathtub filled with kool aid? or is that blood?
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize
