I'll be heading downtown with donuts and a lawn chair at 9am to go Halloween Walk o' Shame spotting.
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
How can I not totally like a guy that told me my boobs were too big for me to be taught how to play golf?
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Any formal decision about whether we're planning to objectify naked women with daddy issues tonight?
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
Drunken snow shoveling. Visiting my family is starting to become a seriously risky venture.
Like 50% of me thinks it'll be weird, 25% of me is curious & 25% of me is horny
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
I'm hoping the sedatives kick in before I drunkenly decide to eat this whole cheesecake.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Randomize
