Is it possible to jerk off a nipple?
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
shouldve known this week was gonna be bad when I threw up in my coffee mug
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
I don't remember how we paid for the cab. I do however remember giving him my heels 2 help with the bill.
I think throwing up in my her purse is probably why we broke up
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
she's sniffed three people's necks on the bus to see who the good smell was coming from...
she's gonna get diseases
VAGINAS ASSEMBLE!
I'm not seeing this movie with you.
Sounds good. Look at us. Planning sex like proper adults.
I left my ice cream out over night, it's melted, fuck this, I just poured Bailey's in it. Problems solved.
The adults are the big ones right?
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
Randomize
