Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
just caught grandpa beating off in the living room
We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
I was mid-pee and he walked in, claimed he was looking for his phone, and then asked if we could hook up since we were finally alone.
so yall hooked up?
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
i'm laying here naked in a pile of empty landshark bottles, is lauren still hiding under the toilet?
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
She finally pulled over after almost hitting 4 cars and a semi and asked me if i was rwady i told her to let my penis to come back out
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
NO BABIES. YOUR VAGINA WILL BLEED WITHIN A FORTNIGHT.
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
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