I know ur sleeping, sorry for waking you but i just saw a girl with mittens on using her nose to control her ipod touch
Day 3 of Lent and I would already kill a puppy if God would give me permission to masturbate
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
I passed out in all my clothes. like my purse too..and with a cup of water next to me..and my last tweet last night was "Bye."
Think of all the island guys I could have. Ah well.
You can not bait me into a "how Stella got her groove back" call and response.
I managed to get through my meeting without throwing up in someone else's office, so there's that for an accomplishment today.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
I wonder how many people I can tell that he has one nut before he finds out it's me spreading it.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
Randomize