i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
I'm watching tv and he's trying to stick a vibrator in my ass
i was so drunk that there were 2 of her, and i didn't know which one to fuck
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
The sex I just had was not worth missing a girls night out.
What's life without a lamp shade you wore home?
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
He hasn't responded in 6 hours and the last thing he sent me was a picture of 7 grams of coke. I'm getting kinda worried
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
Did we seriously steal a wet floor sign from McDonald's then get chased down by a homeless man for it? Never drinking again.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I just motorbotted some guy and my hair got stuck in his nipple ring...owww
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
