I have all these new brothers and sisters I'm just now finding out about
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
I just got a lap dance from a sexy cop in return for giving him his sunglasses back. I think this is going to be the beginning of a really great friendship
Lying naked in bed eating carrot cake of off my bare breasts while watching Family Guy. Tonsilitis isn't all bad!
We decided to try to steal hot dogs but it ended up with me punching him in the face and crying. Pretty solid night
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
Drinking from the bottle. In bed. Making dinosaur noises. Oh man.
I never thought I would have to arrest my own parents on a sunday night
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
If I'm gonna have a rotation of guys, I really should stop them leaving boob bruises...
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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