discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
25 Of The Most Cringeworthy Internet Stalking Fails
My Bio teacher gave me extra marks for putting "deer with AK-47 seeking retribution" at the top of the food chain on my exam. 51% pass here i come!!
I knew you were blacked out when you started refusing beer.
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
21 People Who Barely Escaped Death
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
I just saw my 7th grade teacher at the club. We had a pretty good talk over drinks. Turns out we both like dancing on tables.
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
I am passing the whore torch on to you my friend. Do me proud