omh. i just found SHIT IN THE SHOWER! who the fuck does that? and why do i always seem to find it?
I got laid because I told her I play guitar. I haven't played in 7 years and only know a G chord. I love this place.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
He's slept with 25.5 people. Wtf is a half?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The last thing I remember is trying to split my bridesmaid dress down the back like the incredible hulk.
and you succeeded.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Her dad high fived me on the way out the door. Not the reaction i expected after she came so loud.
Naked chocolate chip pancake making. I just spilled mix all over the place. My boobs are covered in flour. This is not going well.
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
So if your sore it's because you tried to tackle a tree last night. When I told you at the party, you said "What do you expect, I'm an athlete!"
I have a dinner date combo blowjob event with Tristan tonight.
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