I don't wanna do a drive in or see a movie tonight. I wanna play some Golden Tee and butt fuck a girl in the bathroom of some bar and proceed with Golden Tee
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
It was fine until he came back to my place, grabbed a beer, HIGH-FIVED me, and left.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
I discovered a new stretch mark. DONE. LITERALLY DONE.
literally 50% of my time being 20 has involved my genitals thus far
Your level of morning after guilt is too much right now. Do less.
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I wish period tracker had a "on this day" also so i can see who i was with this day last year.
If you break up with me one more time it's over.
That was before I lit my hair on fire
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Randomize
