margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
Note to self. Condoms are not microwavable.
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
we were exchanging secrets last night... she told me about how she put markers in her vaj in middle school. found a keeper.
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
Nope it's him. He's whispering to himself and buying asparagus.
I got an 8 ball and a free entrance pass to the strip club, if i dont get laid tonight I never will.
hey, haven't seen your testicles in a while...you 3 still alive?
It was like die hard. Except with more penises.
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
I love being high. The owl outside stopped who-ing and I could swear I just heard someone say, "Okay, that's a wrap!"
MY BUTT IS BIG ENOUGH FOR AN ANACONDA AND HE DOESNT GET TO ENJOY IT TOUGH SHIT
I'm really excited to meet your new dude! But we really need to find out if he's your cousin first.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
I think the heterosexuals across the hall are negotiating about breeding. How do I figure out which one is against it and back them up?
Randomize
