So can we just skip dinner and I'll just pay you for a blowjob?
Don't tempt me, I need beer money.
Having sex with her is like doing taxes, Happens once a year and I usually end up paying.
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
My last google search of the night was "Things that cost $102.50"
Every grown women needs to pee herself once in her life. It builds character.
How exactly do I approach the whole "Well that was fun. Am I purchasing the Plan B or you?" topic?
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
If I had a dick, I'd stick it in some Oreo pancakes
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
