I thidmdmk you'gre a special person
singing on the bus should be illegal
huh?
There's a group of like 8 white people in the back of the bus harmonizing to sugar we're going down
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
This girl came outta nowhere yelling HOLD MY DICKKKKKK!
We need to go back to the barter system so I can sell my body and just be done with it.
i'm calling it my monica lewinsky shirt now. may it live forever in infamy.
Oh it's not a problem. Cleaning up the yard and disposing of 75 gallons of Jello is all I've got to look forward to today.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
I feel like an involuntary Mother Theresa. I DON'T WANT TO BE ABSTINENT!
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
My professor just asked for my number. Not fucking her till after finals though I learned my lesson last time.
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Legit just heard the bartender tell some Dude "Penis is not an accepted currency in this establishment" and Dude responded "You take Vagina then?"
Randomize
