So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
We decided to go to McDs, but we only had a few minutes to make it to breakfast. We were sprinting full speed ahead when she tripped and you just yelled 'LEAVE HER' and kept your course.
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
Nothing says walk of shame like leather pants in daylight
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
That seems dangerous to buy acid from a stranger on craigslist
Literally just sitting around waiting for someone to come along and fuck my chakras back into alignment
Randomize
