She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
Well, I fucked her. But the sex wasn't all that great. Morning sex never is
Literally just as i started to cum the church bells next ot my house began to ring. either it was the most epic timing ever or god was watching and congratulating me
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I woke up to a text that said "You're a fucking asshole" Why is she so pissed at me?
Im guessing it has something to do with running up to her boyfriend screaming "THIS IS SPARTA" and kicking him in the balls.
Is that considered a cock block?
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
i just kept saying he was red & i was blue and we couldnt become purple. I started crying at one point
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Driving by his house every hour is not stalking, it's a reconnaissance mission... How else can I confront him
She thinks I should try and corrupt him and take his virginity. While I do love virgins, I'm a little too lazy to put in the corruption effort right now. That's a summer kinda job.
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Can I come over?
Sorry I gave up dick for lent. Hit me up on Good Friday tho
Randomize