aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
the theme of the baby shower is Nightmare On Prego Street
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
We spilled a whole bottle of mouth wash and then proceeded to roll around and make out in it. At least I smell minty fresh.
I got whiskey, so I think the blizzard and I are at an even match
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Just for once I'd like my first interaction with a new GP to not be an obvious sex injury.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
Invitations to sext will not be acknowledged until 10 a.m. EST. Thank you for your cooperation. We apologize for any inconvenience.
he tied his pants around my leg to stop the bleeding... i think he just wanted a good excuse to take his pants off
well did it work?
it was a success in both ways.
I gotta do like a month's worth of catch-up personal hygiene today in prep for Christmas so extended family doesn't ask if I'm depressed.
Randomize
