Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
just throwing this out there: period starts tomorrow sooo either sex tonight or not until tues/weds.
i get a bj anyways so it's really your choice.
k i'll be over in 5.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
we just plugged the camera up to the big screen. would you like to come see what you did last night, in high definition?
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
We bonded over the fact that we each, separately, got arrested on the same weekend.
Just living on dreams and a bed of used condoms
I just trimmed my bush to manageable levels. I'm gonna take a nap and then get in there and finish the job.
I knew it was love when he told me he wants to see me have multiple orgasms in one night
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
