her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
The drugs are starting to wear off. Suddenly aware there's a girl with bald patches and 2 guys that don't have a full set of teeth between them.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
that's probably because you left your arm in the fishtank for 90% of the night
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
Mashed potatoes are always the fuckin answer ok.
Can't feel body but making pizza rolls
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I wanna get a tattoo next to my tattoo that says, my ex did this so don't fucking ask
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
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