It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
It feels like Jesus smacked me in the face with the new testament for drinking so much last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course, you get to fuck all night while I'm stuck in the girls bathroom sucking a limp dick for coke
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Oh btw I learned how to say "my penis is a flamethrower" in German. Tonights gonna be fun
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im having a st. Get way fucked till i speak Irish pre game party. Bring a compass cause we are about to get lost
How was it playing wingman?
I feel like I was rockys coach watching him get the shit beaten out of him by Apollo creed
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
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