return my video game
She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
Bitch, I been tryna reach you all day to talk to you about these Dorito tacos.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
We had sex on a lawn chair while fireworks were going off last night. It was unavoidable that I got mosquito bites all over my ass
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
I should be rewarded with oreos for not turning into a raging cunt.
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize
