OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
It's pretty bad when the convenient store clerk can tell you that you're earlier than usual for visiting the store.
I sometimes wonder how many of the girls I know have done anal...and why none of them have ever dated me.
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Knee deep in strippers, everything is comped. will try hard to be there at 8. i promise.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Last time i carry you out of a forest
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
You were sitting in a chair and you said "I just feel like a little fishy, floooooating through the ocean, so pretty"
No. I'm sorry but once your "would go gay for" list exceeds five people, you're bi. Get over it.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
Woke up with a throbbing vagina and a lesbian in my bed. Then for the hell of it we had morning sex. Definitley bisexual now
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
