your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
your facebook page is a work of drunk art.
Bro, I just want to tell you that I'm glad you got fired. I'm going to fuck your replacement.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
If this week is any indication of my life here I've got to get out ASAP. My liver can't hack it.
Uuh, dude you came running out of the bar screaming you didn't want to hear that song, ran face first into a truck, spun around 3 times and hit the sidewalk. I tried to catch you.
Playing nyquil pong with a cat again
All I remember is folk music and a lot of drugs. I am never going "on an adventure" with you again
I'm going to assume that "the army of generous folk dancers" is no longer a goal you are willing to fulfill
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I seriously doubt I'm gonna be able to properly put your dick in my mouth whilst upside down, but I'm willing to give it my best shot
I'm like a freaking volcano of life and sexual frustrations
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
